28 Sep What single guys could learn from the homeless

I’ve decided that any guy who has trouble picking up girls should head on down to Pioneer Square and start hanging out with the homeless guys. We’ve lived in P2 for over 2 months now, and I’ve heard so many great pick up lines, you have no idea. I may have even been tempted to say yes once or twice.

I was taking a picture of the bricks at Fulston Square for my post the other day, and as I turned around to head back to the apartment, one of the Lazarus guys walked up to me and said “are you taking pictures?” I told him that I was, to which he responded “Will you take my picture? Will you? Take my picture so that you’ll always remember me…. [wait for it].… ‘Cause I’m always going to remember you.”

Oh man – I couldn’t help but start laughing, and as I kept walking, he yelled at me, “My name’s Jimmy – don’t forget me!” And I haven’t.

I should start writing them all down so that one of these days, I can post a “Top Ten Homeless Pick Up Lines” for your reading pleasure / benefit, depending on your situation.

The other lesson that should be learned from them (besides how to dress your best: see above) is to get right to the point with a girl. No use making conversation if it’s not going to lead anywhere, right? Many of them will come up to me, say “hi” and then the very next sentence out of their mouth (imagine this with a great “P2 street” accent) “Are you married?”

When I say yes, they just smile and move on. No time wasted.

I don’t know how soon I’ll even need to post more pick up lines, because I’m sure once you use Jimmy’s, you won’t ever need another.

p.s. I’ve included the special picture at the top because of the happy feelings you’ll have when you see a couple holding hands, walking through occidental square. And you’ll want that. Let me know how it works for you.